Does a sense of achievement equate to our happiness?
When considering this question we could look to Self Determination Theory (SDT), which states we have three basic psychological needs.
Autonomy – the need to engage in activities we have a choice in, that we find interesting and value
Competence – the need to achieve valued outcomes and to use our own capacity to do this
Relatedness – the need to feel connected to significant others
When considering our capacity to lead others we could consider SDT as the basis for getting the most out of our people. As leaders, we can create opportunities for people to function well at work and generate a sense of achievement and ultimately happiness. Not only is the task important our perception of our own capacity to do the task and those we work with to complete it. The amount of interest we have in task will not only meet our needs it will enable us to performance at our best and generate a sense of achievement.
The ancient Greeks had their own theory way back when Aristotle advocated eudemonia or human flourishing as the ultimate expression of one’s potential.
With this in mind, are you as a leader creating these opportunities for achievement not only for yourself but also for those you lead and develop?
We are told that in order to be an effective leader, not only do we need to create vision, generate energy, show authority and strategic direction – but how do we demonstrate our human authenticity?
One quality that (Goffee & Jones, 2000) discuss is to selectively show your weaknesses. By no means does this mean if you are the head of the IT department should you reveal your lack of comprehension of cloud technology, but that by demonstrating some human frailty, some vulnerability, you will increase your humanity and endear yourself to your followers.
Quite often you hear employees speak that they don’t feel that senior people in their organisation don’t seem human, or have a heart, or appear to care. We also know within ourselves through the world of Hollywood celebrities, if weaknesses are not made known the public will quickly create one for you. CISCO CEO John Chambers was dyslexic and relies on memorised speeches and Richard Branson revealed in an interview (Branson, 2000) that his biggest weakness in life is that he can’t say no.
By revealing your weakness you are more likely to capture the hearts and minds of your people. By way of this self reveal, this act of sharing something a little personal, it establishes trust and people respond well to this and will be more inclined to follow your lead. By revealing small flaws this also might divert attention from major weakness. You have to be strategic in the way that you reveal but also be genuine. People can pick a fake and this they will remember and for a long time, credibility of which you can kiss goodbye.
What would you reveal as your weakness?
References
Branson, R. (2000, June 20). Interview with Richard Branson – Foreign Correspondent. (J. Byrne, Interviewer)
Goffee, R., & Jones, G. (2000). Why Should Anyone be Led by You? Harvard Business Review , 2-3.
A theme I have recently picked up on in articles about leadership or managers in the workplace is that of being ‘too nice’ at work. This is an interesting area and one I believe managers struggle with. Unless they are completely ‘old skool’ in approach then you seem to get two parallels, the softly approach or the aggressor who likes to invoke fear in your heart. This seems particularly tricky for women as Amy Wilson’s article earlier in the year on Psychology Today – http://bit.ly/Wex2x highlights findings from a recent study.
“Women perceived as being more competitive were deemed competent for the job but also less sociable than other candidates, and thus less hirable. Competent men, however, were described as hirable even if they weren’t socially adept”.
All is not lost for us ladies though as more companies now are recognising that women are better collaborators and relationship builders though clearly we still have to battle the perceptions that dog us if we do come across as aggressive. I recently was called on this very area at work. My approach has always been of the negotiator and to be firm but direct and never reverting to raised voices or displays of emotion. An employee who continually displayed blatant disrespect of others by having no manners in regards to their bodily functions and continually used this as a method of amusement for themselves finally made me crack.
They had been asked on a number of occasions to not do this, but is belligerent in nature so never modified their behaviour. I took the bull by the horns and with raised voice and face to match, told them their behaviour was unacceptable, disrespectful and was to cease immediately, enough is enough. This caused major upset and a complaint was raised about me, unjustly of course, but I feel sometimes the ‘nice’ approach is not the most effective with some people. After that incident I received feedback that it was the best thing I could have done and perhaps I am ‘too nice’ sometimes.
I feel this is particularly difficult in the world of HR as forever is your behaviour and conduct on display and up for criticism by those around you. You must lead by example at all times. A result was achieved and the behaviour has ceased but in that time I had to justify my actions as it was deemed out of character by my male manager and a comment about my credibility was raised to my horror.
I want to make it clear that I firmly believe in treating people with respect and that this ultimately brings out the best in people but what about the “problem children”? what do you do when that approach fails.
In another article by Fiona Smith of The Australian Financial Review, http://bit.ly/2AjdKV- The downside of being nice this is further highlighted by Mara Olekans a professor of management at Melbourne Business School who says,
“being nice all the time can encourage workplace conflict because people at work are too polite to tackle the issues.”
If this issue had been tackled correctly in the first place because the line manager took the ‘nice’ approach we would not have had this situation.I feel the answer is in the path of mutual respect and you have to know how to play your cards right. As Kenny sings you have to “‘know when to hold them, and know when to fold them, know when to walk away, and know when to run”. He should have also added know when to face off! Those around you respect it when someone takes a stand when they feel they cannot or are reluctant to do so but want that change, so sometimes you have to bite the bullet.
My lesson learnt is that by displaying a pattern of behaviour of always being ‘nice’ is not always the most affective and in fact does not create harmony in the work place. I never wanted to be the ‘Scary HR Lady” nor do I want to be the cold, unapproachable HR, it’s a fine balance and clearly one that needs refining and re-tuning continually along the way but the foundation is respect for yourself, what you stand for and who you represent.
